


But Who Would You Live For

by trekkiepirate



Category: The Magicians (TV)
Genre: I continue to be the worst at titles, M/M, No Alice hate here, and discussions of sexy times, just another fix-it fic, rating mostly for Margo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-01
Updated: 2019-05-01
Packaged: 2020-02-10 15:30:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18663205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trekkiepirate/pseuds/trekkiepirate
Summary: Quentin ran. He ran without looking back. He ran like he learned to do in high school when Julia suggested he join the track team to quiet his darkening thoughts. He ran like he and Julia would do around the Brakebills campus, Penny their grumbling timekeeper as they raced.Penny pulled Alice past the door frame and she still fought, counter-intuitively, to reach for Quentin.Quentin cleared the room just as, something like sparklers, exploded from it.





	1. Penny Disapproves of This Nonsense

**Author's Note:**

> Told from Penny's, Margo's and Eliot's perspectives. Because the detail of That Scene that I hated most was the fact that Quentin just stood there, halfway across the room, instead of running without looking back.
> 
> So I changed it.

Penny watched the stand off between Quentin and Everett. He saw something in Quentin's eyes that reminded him of the last decision the Quentin he'd known in the 23rd timeline had made before he became The Beast. Penny knew what Quentin looked like when he'd made a decision that was going to unmake him.

Shit, Julia would be devastated.

Everett was still talking, trying to convince Quentin that he would be a good god, the arrogant fucker.

Penny took a deep breath and shoved right past all the mental wards he'd bullied Quentin into making.

When Everett said Eliot was fine, Penny heard Quentin screaming, “No he's not! He lost too much blood! He's dead, he's dead and if I do this maybe I can be dead with him. I won't bury him again. I can still save Alice. She'll be alive at least. Eliot will be waiting for me.”

Quentin didn't even look at Penny as he said, “Take her. Do it now.”

Penny saw the whole plan as Quentin thought of it. The magic he was starting to do. There was exactly one card to play here, Penny knew, even as he grabbed Alice and started dragging her away. “Eliot's alive!” He called out.

Quentin continued the spell, eyes still locked on Everett as he timed everything out but his once clear thoughts began to jumble.

“Margo said,” Penny yanked Alice away even as she kept screaming, “and we didn't tell you because we needed you to do this.”

Alice tore her eyes from Quentin to look at Penny in confusion and that's when all hell broke loose.

Everett turned, gesturing to Penny as if to say, 'I told you so', the mirror mended, Quentin threw the bottle in, and-

 

He stops, he turns to check that it worked. He needs to be certain his sacrifice will mean something.

Penny saw that thought so clearly, saw Quentin planning it out in his mind.

 

-but now Quentin ran. He ran without looking back. He ran like he learned to do in high school when Julia suggested he join the track team to quiet his darkening thoughts. He ran like he and Julia would do around the Brakebills campus, Penny their grumbling timekeeper as they raced.

Penny pulled Alice past the door frame and she still fought, counter-intuitively, to reach for Quentin.

Quentin cleared the room just as, something like sparklers, exploded from it.

Alice grasped his right arm and it ruined his momentum.

The sparks stick to the size of the door frame as they ram themselves into nothingness against the far wall.

But Quentin's left arm was caught. Alice pulled on him before he could turn himself properly.

Penny gave one last heave and they all fall down, in a pile of pain.

Quentin's left arm is gone, dissolved away by whatever the fuck came from the Seam or the magic or whatever the fuck caused whatever the fuck those sparks were.

“Let's get him and get the fuck out,” Penny shouted, shoving Alice towards the portal while he went and grabbed Quentin's right arm, only arm, to drag him away the way he'd just been doing with Alice.

These fuckers and their inability to do the smart thing, ever. Penny really hopes that Everett was dissolved like Quentin's arm, but if he wasn't that is a Later problem.

They fall out of the mirror inelegantly, sprawled and flailing.

Quentin seemed to finally register the pain of losing an arm and he's howling. There's no blood, thank fuck, but the pain is making his eyes go glassy and unfocused.

Alice put her hands together, trying every healing spell she knew, but the ambient magic is fucking gone.

Penny ran a hand over his face and only looked down when Quentin tugged weakly at his sleeve. “Eliot's... okay? He's alive?”

Knowing he's already planted the hopefully-not-actually-a-lie, Penny nodded. “Yeah, yeah, he's gonna be fine. You'll see him when you wake up.” He can already see Quentin losing consciousness.

Alice's tuts froze mid-motion as Quentin smiled. “El's okay. Love him.”

Penny scooped the nerd up and carried him to the infirmary, Alice following weakly behind.

Margo's eye widen and Penny promised quickly to come back and tell her what happened, once Quentin's been taken care of.

Penny dropped Quentin into the nearby bed. “Doc, got another patient for you.”

Lipson, just finishing Eliot's stitches, looked up.

Penny had never heard that many swear words in that short amount of time before.


	2. Margo Fixes Your Shit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Margo and Alice have a heart to heart.

Margo parked her chair between Eliot's and Quentin's recovery beds. Her hands were holding Eliot's and her eyes couldn't stray from his face, not for a second.

She heard the sound of footsteps: nervous, clunky-heeled steps that ended at Quentin's bedside.

“Penny gave me the details already,” Margo said, knowing who was standing there. “What he saw in Quentin's mind, what Penny had to say to convince him to just fucking run.”

She shook her head. “When he's all healed up, I'm going to kick his actual ass for even thinking that would have been an acceptable outcome for this shitshow.”

Shaking her head, Margo kissed Eliot's hand. Quentin had been in and out, but Eliot hadn't woken up from his medically-induced coma yet so Margo had called in the big guns. “I sent Twenty-Three to Fillory. Sent Fen and Josh a bunny to petition the centaur surgeon who fixed Q's shoulder. He owed me a favor and I had them call it the fuck in. They should be here soon, if you want to stay. I know you like horses and this one can talk back to you.”

“I- Good- I,” Alice started then stopped, those heels now shuffling in a way she hadn't done since she was a Brakebills freshie.

Margo pointed in the general direction of another chair she knew was there. “Park it, Quinn. I can feel you over-analyzing. Act like a closeted jock and spit it out.”

“Margo?” Alice said, “I know you hate me. Less, like you said, but you still do. But I need you to be honest with me. No insults or one-liners, please.

Margo nodded, eyes still on Eliot. She knew what was coming. She'd known since she returned from the desert and saw Q. Since she'd caught them making a very stupid decision to get back together on the stairs. There was only one way this was ever going to go, once it was a fair choice. She knew Alice was starting to know that too.

“Quentin... and Eliot,” Alice began. “Did they-? During the quest, I thought there was something different. After they got the Time Key. I didn't want to ask in case,” she sighed. “In case it was true. Now I think I have to.”

“El loves Q and has from the first day they met,” Margo said, smiling a little as she thought about Eliot breathlessly telling her about the pretty boy he'd discovered. “He never befriended first years. He fucked them or didn't and then moved on. But Quentin was different from the start. Eliot is the best of all things, but also a gigantic dumbass and he wouldn't have been able to tell you why if you paid him in alcohol and coke. But I knew Eliot for a while before you two showed up on the scene. His affection for Quentin was there from the word go or he'd have never gone to the lengths he did to keep Q at Brakebills. Now Q,” Margo said as she smiled again, “loved him when they got back from the Time Key Quest. I don't know exactly what happened there, and you can be sure as shit, I'm going to find that out when these dipshits wake up, but something happened. Quentin stopped looking at Eliot like he wanted to be him and started looking at him like he wanted to fucking marry him.”

She could hear Alice's little gasp, but pretended she hadn't.

“They were comfortable with each other from the beginning, but when they got back it was like... like they were an old married couple. Jesus, I had to hide Quentin from the Fairy Queen in a damn guard outfit, ugliest garment known to man, and Eliot would still cozy up to him whenever he could. They're my two best friends and I know what both of them look like when they're in love.”

Margo turned her head to stare at Alice. “You know what Q looks like when he's in love, what lengths he'll go to. You're dumber than a pet rock if you didn't already know the answer. But like you said, if you didn't ask you couldn't be certain of the truth.”

Alice looked down and Margo felt a surge of affection for the girl. “What, Penny said he saw in Quentin's mind. What Quentin was going to do until Penny said that Eliot was okay.”

“Like I was going to hit anything vital.” Margo scoffed. “I calculated those angles until I had it down to the centimeter. If it worked, I wasn't going to be the one who had put an ice axe through her best friend's pancreas. The blood loss was my biggest worry and Lipson took care of that. When the surgeon gets here, I'm going to introduce them and try to score her the best dicking down she'll ever get as a thank you.”

Closing her eyes, Alice opened her mouth to speak.

“Honey,” Margo gentled her voice, needing the blonde to be able to accept the truth. “I'm lifting your no insults ban. You felt adrift, so you clung to Q because he loved you so much. But then he didn't because of the shit you pulled,” her voice stayed calm, “But then he reached down into the bottomless pit of his heart and found some forgiveness because that's what our Q does, the fucker. He was adrift too.” Her voice hardened slightly. “Have you noticed how thin he's gotten? Or that he started smoking again? Have you seen him eat a full meal at any point?”

Alice shook her head, eyes turning to Quentin, reevaluating him.

“No,” Margo continued, “because you were too goddamn busy trying to redeem yourself. When the whole twisted sister shit hit the fan, Q shut down. He figured getting Eliot back was a shot in the asshole of the dark so he clung to something that was a sure bet. You were all but drooling on his dick and he's always been a sucker for your tits,” Margo glanced down, “which were the first and are currently the only thing I genuinely like about you. You took advantage. He let himself be taken advantage of. You both had pure intentions, but blah, blah, blah, you know it wouldn't have worked in the long run.”

“It wouldn't have,” Alice said, a tear slipping down her face. “But I... I needed-”

“I know,” Margo said, in a voice that hadn't been directed towards Alice in ages: sincerity. “And you know what? You probably deserve some peace and forgiveness and shit. Someday. But think about it. He wants to save you, in the Mirror World, he wants to make sure you live so he decides to die. Then Penny tells him Eliot is going to live and all of a sudden, Q wants to do that too. Penny takes away the one thing Quentin feared most, that we saved El only to lose him and Quentin books it the fuck out of there. Q cares for you and would die for you. In a heartbeat. All that shit in his mind was proof.”

“But he'd only live for Eliot,” Alice finished, eyes turning to Eliot's still form.

Margo nodded. “Does that answer your very, very stupid question about how much these fuckers love each other? And that you should stand down, not only for them, but for your damn self? You're a selfish cunt, but even selfish cunts deserve better than being a consolation prize.”

Alices eyes watered and another tear fell when they heard a soft, chiding, “Margo.”

Without turning around, Margo took one hand from Eliot's and offered it behind her. “Good news, Coldwater. I had your awkward feelings talk for you. You're welcome. Also, your favorite big-dicked centaur surgeon should be here soon; you're double welcome.”

Quentin squeezed her hand weakly. “Thanks, Margo.” He turned towards Alice who was already standing.

“No,” Alice said. “No, Q. Margo's right. She already helped me figure everything out. We don't work, not like that. But... I'd still like you in my life. As my friend. You were always my best friend. I'd like my best friend back. Please.”

“You've got him,” Quentin said. “You were one of my best friends too, Alice.”

Margo turned back around, checking to see if Alice had clocked the difference in their statements.

Alice nodded, biting her lip before throwing herself into Quentin's arms. Arm. “I'm going to go see if Kady will let me help her with the hedge witches. Or if Sheila needs help in The Library. I want to help people.” She sighed. “I want to see who I am when I stop wanting you to love me.”

Quentin's eyes got shiny with tears. “I loved you, Alice.”

“Past tense,” she noted as she stood, letting go. She pointed at Eliot. “Present tense?”

“Past, present and future,” Quentin said, no hesitation.

Alice nodded again and turned to leave. “I'll... I'll call. To check in on Eliot. If that's okay?”

“It is,” Margo answered.

Alice forced a smile that disappeared when Quentin drifted off to sleep again. “It was nice to hear you call me, Vix,” she whispered. “Even just one more time.” She turned to Margo. “Tell Eliot I'll come visit soon. If he actually does want me to.”

“He will,” Margo answered. “I mean, once we catch him up on your whole redemption arc. I think I'll leave the touching butts part out as a courtesy to his feelings.” She put on her High King voice. “You should do the same.”

“I will,” Alice nodded. “Let me know when they're both okay. Please?”

Margo smiled. “I'll even be modern and drop you a text instead of a rabbit.”


	3. Eliot Will Have Many Questions...Later

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The three times Eliot woke up as himself.

The first time Eliot was himself again, he's in a park or something and a Quentin he'd never seen (shorter hair, stylish if bland clothing) was looking back at him. Eliot proved it was actually him and Quentin said his name like it was a prayer, a hope. Eliot smiled and the world was good for a nanosecond.

 

The second time Eliot was himself again, Margo smiled like the sun and Quentin slept on a hospital bed. “Bambi.”

Margo laughed and kissed his hand, his forehead, the crown of his head.

Neither mentioned the tears falling onto his hair.

“Hey,” Margo said, “how was possession?”

“10/10 would not recommend,” Eliot said and noted that she breathed a little easier when he came back with the quip. Eliot understood, he was doing his own mental checks to make sure it's really him, no Monster left. “Bambi, what happened?”

Margo tilted her head. “Do you think you can stay awake long enough for all of it?”

Eliot shook his head. “Probably not. Bullet points?”

“Monster and sister gone. Everyone lived. Library not evil anymore, question mark. Alice also not evil anymore, most likely. Quentin now has a whole wooden arm. Also he is so in love with you it's genuinely worrying.” She smiled. “You will never guess who I'm banging on an exclusive basis.”

Eliot felt sleep tugging at him. “I will have many questions.”

“I will have many answers,” Margo said. “Rest, El.”

 

The third time Eliot was himself again, he heard a shower running and saw Quentin sleeping by his hip. “That cannot be a comfortable position.”

Quentin's head shot up so fast, he almost fell out of his chair. “Eliot!”

“Hey baby,” Eliot said easily, because bravery and Margo said Q loves him. She wouldn't lie about something that world-changing. “So I heard you supposedly lost an arm. Trying to outdo me? Because I have a gaping stomach wound and was possessed so I totally win.”

There are tears in Quentin's eyes and the biggest smile on his face. “Eliot,” he said like he had that moment in the park.

Eliot wanted to hear his name said in that same wondering voice for the rest of this lifetime. “Hey, Q. I have something I need to say.”

“I know. I think I do, anyway. Peaches and plums, motherfucker.” Quentin said like the declaration it is.

“I have been rehearsing this for however the fuck long I was aware in my own head. Let me do this.”

Quentin held up his hand in a gesture of surrender and that's when Eliot noticed the wooden one strapped to his chest. “Oh shit. I thought Margo was throwing some random shit in the recap to make sure I was paying attention.”

“Long story. Relearning magic with this thing is a cock,” Quentin said, clearly having spent a good amount of time with Margo recently. “Tell me what you want to tell me,” he smiled, kissing Eliot's hand in his.

Eliot smiled back. “I love you.” He savored the involuntary gasp Quentin made, even though it couldn't honestly be a surprise at this point. “I was an idiot. I plan to never be that particular flavor of stupid ever again. If you still want me. Pika-Q, I choose you.”

Quentin fell into the bend of Eliot's elbow, laughing himself breathless. “Holy shit. Holy fucking shit, that was so cheesy. That was so cheesy and nerdy.”

“Well I tailored it to its intended recipient,” Eliot grinned. “So that's a yes?”

Quentin chuckled, his breath hot against Eliot's arm, “Give me a minute. I'm trying to come up with a Pokemon reference for your name too.”

“Or you could kiss me,” Eliot gently nudged Quentin with his elbow. “I vote for the kissing.”

Lifting his head, Quentin bit his lip and shined (that was the only way to describe how much he seemed to glow as he looked at Eliot, fuckety fuck he's the most beautiful thing in the entire world and when did that happen exactly). He leaned in and was almost on Eliot's lips when he pulled back abruptly.

“Oh wait, Squirt-El!” Quentin crowed, triumphant and happy and Eliot loved him so much his chest could crack from the way his heart expanded.

Eliot reeled him in by his neck and kissed him. “I love you, Q,” he said against Quentin's lips.

“I love you too, El,” Quentin beamed.

Eliot tilted their heads and he tasted the smile on Quentin's lips.


End file.
